First, be sure that your father has been thoroughly assessed by a physician and
that he is properly diagnosed. In some cases, dementia symptoms are caused by a
treatable medical condition. If your father has been diagnosed with a progressive
(irreversible) dementia, continue to pay close attention to his behavior and his
complaints—and report any changes to his doctor. The doctor may propose treatments
that will have the effect of reducing feelings of frustration.
As a family caregiver, you will have many opportunities to manage his experience
to help reduce frustration. It helps to stick to a daily schedule. Program your
dad’s routine so that activities of daily living such as dressing, eating and bathing
occur at about the same time each day. Incorporate as many of his regular activities
and habits as possible from the days before he showed signs of dementia.
Lifestyle choices can also reduce frustration, while helping to improve quality
of life. For example, provide a healthy diet, regular hydration and as much physical
exercise as practical. Try to keep his mind engaged continually throughout the day
with simple activities and to maintain social contacts.
One way to promote both activities and socialization is by enrolling your father
in a social adult day program. Another is to round up friends to visit him and to
direct him in activities. Selection of mental and physical activities should strike
a balance, promoting autonomy but avoiding frustration. If an activity proves frustrating,
adjust or eliminate it so that your dad can enjoy success at most of the things
he attempts.
One excellent source of activities is “Keeping Busy: An Activities Guide for Persons
with Dementia” by James R. Dowling. You will also find activities in the “Best for
Last” column feature in each issue of care ADvantage magazine, a free quarterly
magazine for caregivers published by the Alzheimer’s Foundation of America.
Along with promoting stable daily routines, engaging activities and stimulating
social interactions, you can cultivate your loved one’s sense of security and comfort
through the way you communicate with him. Find ways to continually reassure him
that you love him and will take care of him. Use your smile, words and gestures
to let him know you care.